


HoloAfterLive: Under the Sky of Time

by wrsw



Series: HoloAfterLive [2]
Category: Hololive, Virtual Streamer Animated Characters
Genre: Afterlife, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Existentialism, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-07
Updated: 2021-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-12 20:09:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,591
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29889912
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wrsw/pseuds/wrsw
Summary: Tokino Sora reflects on life, and on what it means to make it to heaven.
Series: HoloAfterLive [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2191593
Comments: 10
Kudos: 37
Collections: HoloAfterLive





	HoloAfterLive: Under the Sky of Time

**Author's Note:**

> Remember to read the first work in this series to understand what's going on.
> 
> And we’re back! Just a one-shot from the HoloAfterLive universe. I'm separating the stories because the plot arcs are starting to separate and disconnect from one another - they will intersect eventually, but that isn't for a long time.
> 
> This has a little more philosophy than my works normally do, which really says something given my usual writing style. It’s somewhat existential in nature; I hope you don’t mind.

Tokino Sora listened to the commotion a room away in the house.

She knew what it was; Fubuki was assembling her first PC in heaven, and nothing would stop her at this point. That PC would almost certainly be joined by a second, and eventually there’d be an equal number of computers to people after-living in the house; both Fubuki and Korone were utilizing the fact that they no longer biologically needed sleep to the fullest extent that they could.

Sora wasn’t sure why she still slept; it was one of those holdovers from the mortal realm she didn’t quite get over in the same way.

It helped that she wasn’t alone; none of them had fully given up on their mortal habits despite the fact they weren’t biologically required anymore. Fubuki had quickly decided sleep was no longer something she needed, but she still enjoyed the taste of food too much to give up the idea of eating breakfast with the bunch that still did that.

 _Actually,_ now that Sora thinks about it, _I think all of the hololive gamers actually still prefer to eat._ It eased the heart quite a bit to see them eat together; regardless of the chef, she loved seeing that there was an extent to which this house had become a family.

Or maybe they’d always been a family, they just took until the end of the world to admit it. Sora appreciated the more mundane moments such as these; they were the few reminders she had left that they had all come from the mortal world.

The world that was no longer a thing. And that family, as lovely as it was to reunite with her friends, was still missing over three quarters of its members.

 _Fubuki was right,_ Sora had come to realize. As much as it was lovely, it didn’t feel complete.

The rules that separated the afterlife were never designed to handle the case of a mortal making friends from the underworld. Sora supposed that made sense; and at the very least, they had a way to contact them now. Coco had complained about the weather down in the underworld in their online chat room, but if that was the worst any of them got, she supposed the group was doing fairly well.

No, she was disappointed at losing the underworlders, but it didn’t puzzle her in the same way that the last, largest, and still uncontacted group did: the separation between the in-between and the heavenly realm. She didn’t know who did or didn’t get in, aside from the fact that Kanata mentioned both Luna and Noel were sent there and not to Heaven.

She didn’t really get it; why her and not them?

She recalled her trial.

The positives were fairly self-explanatory: Sora was humble, never blaming others; she was exceptionally kind, a hard worker who always pushed herself, always tried her best to help others live the best life they could, and both her interpersonal and intrapersonal (1) relationships were positive and wholesome. No one argued against that; while Sora found it embarrassing to have that much praise thrown at her all at once, she also found it hard to disagree with any of what was said. It wasn’t just that they called her ‘Seiso’ or anything; her mortal record didn’t lie about the actions that demonstrated the strength of her character.

No, it only bugged her because she wasn’t all _that_ great; she was only human. What was the difference between her and those who didn’t make it?

Sora mentally ran the checks between those who made it and those who hadn’t, as far as confirmations went.

She thought about the eight of them who now lived in Heaven. Amane Kanata was an angel by species, of course; she couldn’t _not_ make it there unless she did something truly terrible. AZKi was much like herself; while less social, she was just as kind and pushed herself just as far as Sora ever did, back while she was alive, so it made sense that she joined her up here.

 _And even while she isn’t alive,_ Sora supposed - AZKi had found a venue to sing at, and last she heard, she was considered a hit among the souls of the lower region of Heaven.

 _Ah, right, the lower/upper Heaven thing._ She’d have to ask Kanata about that later; though from the looks of it, all souls always started in the lower regions of the skyward realm.

Ookami Mio, who was after them, was fairly self-explanatory - she might have had less of the godlike reverence (2) that Sora seemed to receive (and, to be perfectly honest, was rather tired of receiving), and while less sheerly energetic than Sora, her motherly attitude towards people truly was heartwarming - she could be a wonderful parent to any child, and her kindness far outstripped even her own, as far as Sora was concerned.

A real shame she’d never be able to have that now.

_Possibly? Questions for later, I suppose…_

Fubuki, Korone, Okayu, and Subaru, in comparison, fell into a similar group, though all with slightly different attitudes. Fubuki accepted her death right away, and immediately decided that she could work with that reality. Korone and Okayu weren’t far behind; despite the difference in visible enthusiasm, it was clear Okayu was going to rejoin the gamers as soon as an opportunity became available. Subaru was practically jumping with excitement over that fact.

Next, the underworlders.

Choco, Ayame, and Towa were all in the same category - they were all underworlders who were native to the lower planes; much like Kanata, there was no way for them to _not_ have gone there. Mel was in a similar boat; the underworld was more-or-less the default for her, as the fact that there was no sun in the underworld was good for her.

And finally, there was Kiryu Coco, hololive's only sinner so far. She should be right up here in heaven, as far as Sora was concerned; being dinged for tempting an angel seemed harsh.

“Whatcha thinking about?”

Sora blinked, not having expected Fubuki to walk out of the room with the in-progress PC construction going on.

“Oh, nothing much.”

Fubuki looked suspiciously at her. The kitsune, like always, was quite expressive - this wasn’t the look of ‘I want to interrogate you right now’ but it was the look that implied that said interrogation was not all that far off; not because of Fubuki herself necessarily, but because Sora wasn’t hiding her thoughts well enough to avoid it being read by someone who _would_ ask questions.

Shirakami Fubuki was too good a friend to intrude like that.

Sora looked down, thinking about her options.

_Hmm...maybe I should talk this out with Fubuki-_

She was apparently too late, as Fubuki had left the room.

Sora decided that she needed to speak to Fubuki, so she left to follow the fox girl.

She was intercepted by Mio, who had been heading in Sora’s direction.

“Sora-senpai...I want to speak with you.”

“Fubuki put you up to this, didn’t she.”

Mio laughed.

“That obvious?”

“Fubuki passed me by with a look of her’s. I...don’t want to really talk about it right now - but I do want to speak about things, because it’s starting to bug me. Next time we guys eat together, I’ll bring the topic up. Is that okay with you?”

Mio nodded her head.

“Alright, then.”

* * *

Sora wished she hadn’t said that, now that they were in the scenario.

It was breakfast, and it was waffles, a handle offensive option that virtually none of them would object to. AZKi hadn’t shown up; she apparently was out scouting a venue that she had plans to sing at. Sora was pretty sure that out of the six of them present, only her and Okayu actually slept. Despite not needing sleep anymore, Sora slept like that was the case just to see if her mind would be any clearer having rested.

It wasn’t. She sighed.

The rest of the table immediately looked at Sora, worried - except Mio.

Sora finally spoke: “Alright, something’s been bothering me. Fubuki noticed it yesterday, and so did Mio, though I didn’t tell either of them. You see, I’m bothered by the fact that I made it into Heaven.”

Subaru interrupted loudly.

“What?! Sora, you’re like, the best of all of us, how could you-” 

And then Subaru laughed.

Mio hit her in the back, admonishing her: “You’re laughing. Sora-senpai is having an existential crisis and you’re laughing.”

Sora immediately facepalmed, realizing that leading with that led to a rather unfortunate sentence if cut midway.

“That’s not what I meant!”

Korone perked up.

“Then what did you mean?”

Sora paused, thinking about how to phrase it, before continuing:

“I don’t know why I made it into Heaven but the rest of us didn’t. What makes me more special than any of us who didn’t get up this far?”

The rest of the room went suddenly gloomy.

Okayu looked up from her plate.

“Well...Ayame, and Choco are demons, and Towa’s a devil.”

Fubuki interrupted, clearly unimpressed.

“That doesn’t mean they shouldn’t be allowed to visit.”

Mio added with a frown: “And Mel’s out for similar reasons, due to being a vampire; this leaves Coco as hololive’s only sinner.”

Sora looked down.

“Yeah. And it’s really unfair, too - I mean, yes, Kanata was an angel, but...I mean, she was our Kanata. It seems unfair for Coco to get sent to the underworld for that; she could easily belong up here with the rest of us. There’s no reason I deserve to be up here any more than she does, if we take out the arbitrary rules about angelic love.”

The rest of them looked at her.

Fubuki pointed out the obvious: “To be fair, I think she was partially in trouble for that and also in trouble for the part where she yelled back at the angels. It’s _Coco,_ she’d easily take going to the underworld as a perfectly valid price to pay for yelling at the angels for what they did to Kanata. For better and for worse, that’s our Coco.”

The rest of the room smiled. That was fair, actually - Coco’s last words to Kanata were a simple “It’s worth it.” which was as sure a sign as anything else that Coco was fine with that decision. The disappointment was merely in that she had to make the decision in the first place.

Sora decided to continue.

“And that’s been fun and all, but actually, I wanted to talk about Noel and Luna.”

The rest of the table looked at her.

“Kanata said they were unusually early, and that they were both sent to the in-between. And that’s what’s left me puzzled about all of this. What separates the in-between from Heaven? What reason should I be in Heaven that Noel and Luna don’t have?”

The table was silent, except for Okayu, who had quietly gone back to eating another waffle (3).

There were answers, but none that wouldn’t paint Luna and Noel in a bad light - this didn’t seem like a conversation for them to make fun of their partners. They were all puzzled.

Mio took a long, hard look at Sora’s face.

Something was off. Yes, the current topic bugged her, but it wasn’t the only thing. On some level, she knew it was personal, but she decided to ask and bring it out into the open.

“Sora-senpai...what was your first impression of the afterlife like?”

Sora blinked. It was an unexpected question. And yet, it suddenly solved everything.

“That’s it, isn’t it.”

She didn’t smile, but her face was in a fairly neutral position as the realization clicked.

The rest of the table was in the dark, of course. Korone gave Sora a confused look.

“What’s it?”

“I knew I was dead. I’m not sure about all of you, but I remember what dying was like. I remember the horror. And when I died, I’d known. I was ready to say goodbye; the moment it finally hit...it was peaceful. The horrors of the end...they were over; I wanted to cry, both in sadness, but also in relief. I don’t want to remember it...but I also want to.

“The angels say that they will offer to help me not remember it...but to simply not acknowledge my bad memories...that would make me less human, wouldn’t it? I don’t want to forget, even if...even if those memories aren’t pleasant. Maybe that’s what it is. We all know we’re dead. Maybe it’s acceptance that separates; Luna and Noel...they’re stubborn. They might have not been ready to die; the in-between, out of the three afterlives, is...it’s probably the afterlife that is the ‘closest’ to the mortal realm. I don’t know, though; it’s just my guess.”

Okayu pointed out an issue with that theory:

“Okay, but Korone got in, and she literally wasn’t aware that she wasn’t dead until she was informed by the court.”

Sora paused; that theory had been shot fairly thoroughly, it seemed...or maybe not.

“Koro-chan, did you have any regrets in life?”

Korone thought about the question.

“Well, I don’t like how it ended, but there wasn’t anything I could do about that. I felt like a good dog. It was a bad ending, but I ended it about as well as I could’ve. I think; I don’t remember.”

Okayu nodded, adding quietly and in a somewhat melancholic tone:

“I’m much the same, to be honest. I wasn’t happy or anything, but the only regret I had - that I died apparently unsure about Koro-chan - was resolved as soon as I saw her. She’s still the same lovely dog as always.”

Sora looked to Mio, Fubuki, and Subaru.

Mio sighed.

“I don’t have regrets. I don’t have things that I’m still feeling like I could’ve done better. We died because the entire world went on fire; I was vaporized in the blast wave. I don’t think we need to mention Fubuki; her response to dying was to apparently just roll with it and to start a hololive second season.”

Fubuki just smiled contently in acknowledgement and bobbed her head from side to side.

Subaru spoke last: “I was pretty happy with my life. I mean, the ending sucked, but honestly it’s not like I had it worse than anyone else. I mean, sure, it was the entire world rather than my house that caught fire, but really, it wasn’t that painful; either that or my memory has managed to block out the pain, which would be kind of funny given I still remember the worldfire.”

The rest of the table looked at Subaru in horror, Mio finally speaking first:

“Subaru, I don’t see what’s funny about dying so painfully that your memory has to block it out.”

Sora sighed. That _was_ Subaru; even while alive she was always like that.

She continued: “Ah, right, and AZKi’s a lot like Fubuki in that she’s gone right back to singing. It basically confirms it: you all died without regrets. You all accepted our deaths gracefully, content with the lives we lived. You all met the end, ready to move on.”

And then tears formed in her eyes, but hadn’t spilled. She looked down, avoiding eye contact from any of her kouhais.

“And if that’s the case...then I shouldn’t be here. I’m not ready to move on! I’m...not...”

She felt a hug from behind.

It was Mio.

“No, you are. The judges just knew you better than you know yourself.”

Getting up, Sora returned the hug, and then cried silently.

Fubuki asked a question, not entirely sure if it reach the intended recipient:

“Sora-chan...what regrets do you have? What do you wish you did differently in life?”

Sora said nothing, responding with silence aside from a quiet sob.

Subaru replied to the silence.

“Then that’s the point! You didn’t have any! You accepted it perfectly!”

Sora hadn’t moved from Mio’s embrace. “But...I’m still...it still hurts...”

Mio held a motherly smile, the melancholic smile of a parent trying to comfort a child. She was about to speak when another voice entered the conversation.

“Of course it does. You’re burdened with the suffering of the end times; most of us aren’t.”

It was AZKi, who had just walked in from wherever she was. She continued speaking.

“I’m not sure if you ever lost a good friend back when you were alive...but I did (4), and it wasn’t like any of it was my fault. That didn’t mean it didn’t hurt; of course it did, and I’m slightly frustrated because you would _never_ hold anyone else to this standard.”

“You’d tell any of us it was okay, that we could take a break. It’s hard to move on from tragedy; and you’ve suffered the most of all of us. When I said you’ve earned yourself a break, I _truly meant that._ Please, Sora-chan, it’s okay that you don’t feel okay. I know it looks like I’m coping well, but that’s because singing is...it’s just what I do for everything; both in happiness and in sorrow. I sing to move past things, too. It’s just what I do.”

Mio let go of Sora. The instant she did so, another pair of hands quickly pulled the former virtual idol into a tight hug; those hands belonging to Fubuki, who spoke.

“Going back to hololive with my best friends...that’s how I move on. That’s how I move on from what happened to us. I won’t move on until we’re back, and that’s why I’m doing what I’m doing. I think that’s what they’d say, too. You aren’t me, and we don’t want you to be.”

She looked back to Okayu and Korone, who both nodded in acknowledgment.

Sora looked sadly at Fubuki, her eyes red from crying. She returned the hug.

“You didn’t sit around, though. You’ve moved on by trying to do something wonderful. It feels like you’re the senpai now; you’re the first member of HoloAfterLive, not me.”

And then something unexpected happened.

Fubuki cried. It was quiet, just a few silent tears streaming down her face.

“Sora-senpai...it all happened because of you. And I think you misunderstand; I’m doing this because I don’t know what else to do; this is how _I_ cope with the end of the world. I think that’s all I really know how to do, and even if I’m the first member of ‘HoloAfterLive’, you’re still the first member of the original hololive - and you always will be. Take as long as you need.”

Fubuki paused to breathe.

“We’ll still be here, whenever you’re ready, because we’ll _always_ be hololive. Both you and me.”

Sora thought about it.

“No, I shouldn’t wait too long. But I think...I think I need this. Thank you, Fubuki-chan. You are truly the best friend one could ever have.”

Fubuki smiled. “And you were the best idol I could ever hope to share a stage with, so I should thank you, Sora-chan. I hope we’ll perform on the same stage again, in the future. I _know_ we’ll perform on the same stage again.”

Korone and Okayu had walked up to the duo while they were talking and then pulled them into a group hug, which Mio, Subaru, and even AZKi joined in on.

* * *

_A little while later…_

Shirakami Fubuki had set up her new computer, and was currently getting everything together for her re-debut. She just had to click the ‘go live’ button and she’d be live.

She paused, staring at the button.

She couldn’t do it. She had rushed; she was getting ready to restart her career not just because she wanted to (though she did want to), but because she didn’t know what else to do, and now that she was at the moment to restart her career, she was paralyzed.

 _Sora had the right idea,_ she realized. Despite everything, Fubuki _wasn’t_ just fine with everything. The idea of restarting hololive was enticing, but it was so much more than just throwing a channel online and occasionally going live. She could throw all of her infinite time into going live and it wouldn’t solve the fundamental issues; it wouldn’t be hololive without everyone else.

It wasn’t exactly the same as Sora, of course, but Fubuki wasn’t fully ready to restart either. Sora had just recognized it in herself earlier; of _course_ she wanted her best friends with her before becoming an idol in the afterlife. Even during the first months of hololive, when she was hololive’s only talent, she wasn’t alone - she had A-chan and the rest of the hololive staff backing her up.

She didn’t have any of that, now. Fubuki still had her friends - but she hadn’t formed a plan; as far as she was concerned, even if she went live, there still would be no HoloAfterLive. Hololive was somehow far greater than just the sum of its talents. And right now, there would only be one member if she went live - Fubuki herself.

Fubuki stared at her computer.

And then she left.

_Not today._

* * *

Sora was surprised to watch Fubuki walk out of the computer room so quickly. She figured that Fubuki would’ve gone live immediately, and then streamed for a day or two straight. She then thought about how long Korone was likely to stream now that sleep was no longer required, and shuddered at the thought.

_Korone would probably stream for a month straight._

Sora was even more surprised when she listened to the words that Fubuki had to say:

“You were right.”

“Hmm?”

“It’s probably better to take some time to think about things. I was in a rush; but to be honest, I’m not ready to restart hololive.”

Sora was surprised at this, but as she thought about it more, it made sense.

“You’ve always said you’re hololive’s #1 fan.”

Fubuki smiled.

“Yeah, but that doesn’t mean I’m it’s #1 organizer. I don’t really know what I’m doing anymore, and, well, to be honest, what you said still bothers me.”

“Um, sorry?”

“Nonononono, it’s more...if we’re correct, then what regrets do the other members have?”

_Oh, that._

“Noel probably regrets not actually getting married to Flare when she had the chance. That’s if she even accepted that she’s dying - now that I think about it, Korone might not have realized she was dead, but she doesn’t feel too bad about it. Noel...might take the news a bit harder. Might take the news Flare died with her even harder than that.

“As for Luna...”

Sora frowned.

“I honestly don’t know. She might also have not been at peace with the idea of dying.”

Fubuki frowned.

Then she smiled in that way that meant she was going to do something crazy while acting entirely casual about it.

“Then we’re just going to have to help her get used to it!”

She paused.

“You know what, I think we need to call an idol meeting. A real one, because I think it’s time to theory-craft a bit. We still don’t have in-between contact, so I think it’s time for some guessing games.”

* * *

Mio was puzzled.

“So, let me get this straight: we’re theory-crafting about all of our best friends to try and guess who did or didn’t die with any regrets or non-major sins.”

Fubuki smiled. “Yes! We’re trying to figure out who went - or is going to go - to Heaven or not!”

She drew up a list containing all of the hololive talents.

“So let’s go down the list! Starting with…”

She looked at the top of the list, sorted by generation, and pointed to the rest of the table.

“Sora and AZKi obviously made it.”

She then pauses, and frowns.

“Does...does Roboco-san even have a chance? She’s...”

The whole room went silent.

Sora spoke. “She was...honestly, she was as human as any of us were, as far as I’m concerned. If she didn’t have a soul...I don’t know what I’d do. I just...don’t know.”

Fubuki continued.

“Sakura Miko.”

Sora made her guess: “I’d guess she’s going to make it to Heaven. She’s not the kind of person to have mortal regrets, I think.”

Mio interjected.

“That last step only applies if she hasn’t racked up any karmic debt. Remember the great Peko-Miko war?”

Sora shuddered, as that probably knocked both of them out of contention.

“She was...she was overall a really good person. I think she’s a solid in-between choice.”

Fubuki continued. “Hoshimachi Suisei?”

Sora seemed to have far too much optimism: “Heavenbound for sure, it’s fairly obvious.”

Subaru interjected: “Aside from, uh, slight psychopathic tendencies? Honestly, I’m not sure where that lies. It might have been harmless in the end.”

The rest of them sighed. That was generation zero, and they already had two unknowns - one who might not even get an afterlife.

Sora really hoped that wasn’t the case.

Fubuki continued.

* * *

The final list was out.

In the end, the only very quick probable claims were that all of the lovers probably regretted not confessing properly while they were alive. That was the only thing that Sora could see both Noel and Flare being kept out for; she wouldn’t have been surprised if the first thing Noel did in the in-between was find Flare and properly marry her.

Marine was also a pretty solid pick for in-between, more-or-less because her _tendencies_ were probably frowned upon by the angels, but she wasn’t so far off the rails to get sent to Hell for them. Pekora was also a good pick, given her involvement with Miko. Aqua was shy and likely had issues with confidence, which means that she likely didn’t make it all the way here, either.

Luna was confirmed by Kanata herself, so that was also known.

Mio had brought up that while Shion and Rushia had gone to demon school with Ayame, neither of them were actually demons, and both of them had good behavior otherwise - making it likely that they’d be sent to the in-between.

That left the seven members of Heaven stumped. They’d gone through the list, and there were still quite a few unknowns.

The list ran as follows:

_Heaven (confirmed): Sora, AZKi, Fubuki, Mio, Okayu, Korone, Subaru, Kanata_

_Hell (confirmed): Mel, Choco, Ayame, Towa, Coco_

_In-between (confirmed): Noel, Luna_

_Heaven (projected):_   
_\- A-chan_   
_\- AkiRose? Not sure about potential regrets_   
_\- Matsuri if she avoids being too perverted during her trial AND has no regrets_   
_\- Watame seems likely_   
_\- Maybe Nene if she keeps her pride in check during her trial_   
_\- Maybe Polka if she doesn’t cause too much chaos during her trial_   
  
_Hell (projected):_   
_\- Calliope because she’s a reaper_   
_\- maybe Ollie since she’s undead…?_   
_\- Haato if Haachama becomes dominant personality during her trial_

_In-between (projected):_   
_\- Miko, Shion, Flare, Rushia, Pekora, Marine, all very likely_   
_\- Aqua’s shy, likely has self-doubts_   
_\- Anyone that could have regrets but might not: Watame, AkiRose, Matsuri _   
_\- Anyone that might accidentally ruin their own trial: Matsuri, Nene, Polka, Haato_

_Unknown: **Roboco** ,  Kiara, everyone else (dependent on minor sins and regrets) _

Fubuki smiled.

“It’s a good start. Once Kanata gets back from her shift at the court of angels, we should see if we can get any contact with hololive fantasy - it appears they might have all made it to the in-between!”

The rest of them smiled.

Fubuki grinned; they were one step closer to bringing things together.

**Author's Note:**

> (1) Intrapersonal: meaning in relation to oneself - “intra” is the opposing prefix to “inter”, meaning between others, so interpersonal relations are relations between people and intrapersonal the relation one has with oneself. She’s at peace with herself, in other words.
> 
> (2) Ironic, given that the “kami” in “Ookami” from Mio’s full name actually means god, and that Sora is, in fact, 100% fully human, and is one of the few members of the hololive cast to actually be that way.
> 
> (3) Look, when you’re offered infinite waffles with no consequences, you might as well dig in.
> 
> (4) In memory of 焦茶, AZKi’s former illustrator, who passed away in 2020. The legacy of his work continues to live on to this day.


End file.
